Category Archives: Lyrics

C-Dubs The Least-Loved Ranch Hand

There’s Carlson, Whit, Crooks, The Boss, George and Lennie. There’s Candy and Curly and Slim (’cause he’s skinny). But do you recall The most disrespected of all? C-Dubs, the least-loved ranch hand, Didn’t even have a name And everyone who … Continue reading

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Quoth St. Stephen

My toenails are an unattractive Lot, a sad, objective fact of Which I’m all too well aware. It’s why my feet are rarely bare In places squeamish people lurk Like public markets, church and work. They’re not all bad–most folks … Continue reading

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A Dark Night

Batman Be the Batman When you have a choice (And, yes, you always have a choice) Always, always raise your voice And holler that man Be the Batman It’s a bad day to be Robin Be the man who does … Continue reading

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The Tansy Verses: No. 9

Happy Birthday! 8 + 10 Plus 6 + 5 Plus 2 + 3 Makes 34! Is it a sin You’ve shown your Flowered shorts to me? I’ve placed a lot of Books on shelves In your apartment; Weirdly, none Address … Continue reading

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On A Clear Night You Can What, Now?

Assuming the night is both clear and unending And that you have infinite powers of sight, Then the lyrics make sense. Or else, Barbra’s pretending You’ve met those conditions. If not, it’s just trite.

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Totally Fair Use

Felicitations on your natal day Felicitations on your natal day Nonny-nonny, Willie, nonny-hey Felicitations on your natal day

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My Grandfather’s Joke

My grandfather’s clock was too big for the shelf So he sold it and bought a big shelf. He’s never on time for appointments. You wait Or give up and go fetch him yourself. If I drew you a graph … Continue reading

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