Every time you click a button
On the internet, a shred
Of you becomes less sheep than mutton.
They’ve commoditized your head!
Things you like and those in which
You show the slightest interest go
Into a database of pitch
Proposals so the ads that show
Below, beside, above the streams
Of social media you’ve browsed
Statistically predict your dreams
And make Consumer You aroused.
Listen, want to stick a brick in-
Side their data? Click a chicken!
The Arctic Tortoise wears a coat
Of undelivered mail. His boat
When under sail is overground.
He’s never swum but rarely drowned.
His shell is caked with ice and sleet
But lined inside with mice for heat
And company. His word for snow
Means love as well (but not hello).
The Arctic Tortoise counts his friends
In favors owed. When night descends
He lights the little lamp beside
The chicken coop. The chicken died
Some time ago from cold and shame.
The Arctic Tortoise is to blame
But compensates with powdered eggs.
He drips Tabasco on his legs
And licks them when he’s feeling glee.
A party animal is he
Who cherishes his pointy hat.
You’re Arctic Tortoisy like that.
If Monday isn’t ready for me,
That’s okay. I’ve got a list
Of six or seven others we
Can choose from, ones that won’t resist
My overtures or turn a chilly
Shoulder my direction when
I say hello. That’s fine. No, really.
Maybe next week? See you then!
I’m beside myself, but we
Between my selves cannot agree
On why it is we’re so upset
So that’s why I’m not yelling yet.
Maybe if I just sit quiet
I’ll remember. If I try it,
Though, and nothing comes in time
I’ll miss my chance to post a rhyme
Today, and maybe blow my streak.
Yes, I’m a compulsive geek
But 56 months straight’s a lot…
So I’ll let go what I forgot.
I thought it up and wrote it down
Before it had a chance to fade
It might have earned me much renown
Instead I’ve been again betrayed
By technological reliance
(“Local draft” means “roll the dice”)
Darn this not-so-smart appliance
Inspiration won’t strike twice
Learning stuff is hard enough;
Recalling how you learned is tough.
By learning something, though, you earn
The right to fight how others learn.
If it worked for you, that’s great!
And if it didn’t, and you hate
The subject to this very day
They still should teach the thing that way.
If it worked out for you (or not)
Then that’s the way it should be taught
Forever. After all, your kid
Will likely ask you how they did,
And when you’re busy homework-checking
There’s no time for what-the-hecking.
As the grown-up, you should know
Exactly how they’re s’posed to show
Their work, and if you don’t, it’s ’cause
They’ve changed the way it always was!
Education shouldn’t change.
Today’s technique should not be strange.
The way you learned will always do.
Just wipe your slate clean when you’re through.