First Date(?)

Thirty years are in the books
Since she–the blonde with legs and looks
And talent–made the bold first move
Of which Ms. Hawkins would approve
And called me on the telephone
And asked me out. Just us? Alone?
Well, no, we weren’t the only ones:
We’d join the cast of All My Sons
(The Arthur Miller comedy
Of treason, death and scandal–whee!)
In which she played the ingenue,
So there’d be six or eight, plus two.

So, it’s a date! Or, maybe not?
At any rate, my date(?) was hot!

My ’68 VW
Sat seven; that night, only two
Rode putt-putt-putt from El Cajon
To Old Town: She and me, alone…
But when we reached the theater,
I counted eight, plus me and her.
The ten of us were there to see
An acting friend named Anne as she
Played Lena Neff, Glenn Curtiss’ spouse
In Wings* at Old Town Opera House.
*I can’t be sure that that’s the name;
Three decades on, it’s all the same.

So, not a date, then, just a night
With (lots of) friends. No pressure. Right?

The Opera House’s seats were steep
And narrow, and for us to keep
Our party all together, we
Sat five across up top, then three
In front of them, which left a pair
Of seats beneath them, which was where
The two of us were ushered. Wait,
They’re watching us. Is this a date?

House lights down. Did she lean in?
I’d slipped my arm around her when
I heard the catcalls from behind…
But when she sighed, I didn’t mind.

Act II of Wings: A pleasant blur,
‘Cause I was on a date. With her!

Cat Bath

Bathe your cat! She’ll thank you for it.
If she hisses, just ignore it.
Hissy fits mean feline fun
And shredded flesh for everyone!

Pretty kitty loves lavage!
If you’ve a sink in your garage,
Though, wash your princess there, in case
She sweetly lacerates your face.

Life Happens. Sh*t Is Perceived.

Every now and then there comes a day
On which you’re forced to turn your energy
From dawn to dusk to merely hold at bay
The thought, “This day just sucks.” Today, for me.
It doesn’t take a lot to flip the script
From Happy Thursday! to Just Make It Stop!
The slope’s so steep you might not see you’ve slipped,
Then BAM! You’re at the bottom of the drop.
But now the sun’s set safely out of town,
My belly’s full, a roof’s above my head,
My family’s safe and happy. Rain comes down
Outside. My true love’s sleeping in my bed.
It’s not the most delightful day I’ve had,
But truly, it’s a long, long way from “bad.”


My Quest for Limits knows no bounds,
Which makes it hard to know if I’ve
Already found them. Coffee grounds
Throw off the dogs, but quests survive.*

*Eddie Murphy taught me that,
But I’m just writing through my hat.
The thought was finished after “them”;
The rest was Quest for Rhyme. (Ahem.)