Butt First

Dogs are less suspicious than
Most humans beings, probably
Because they sniff a new friend’s can
Before eye contact. Works for me!

Pinocchipup

The longer the nose on a dog, says a study,
The longer they’re likely to live, which is why
If you don’t think that farm upstate’s right for your buddy,
It’s best to let sleeping dogs lie.

The Best Defense Is A Good Dog Fence

It’s neither the size of the dog in the fight
Nor the size of the fight in the dog,
It’s rather the size of the hole when they bite
That reroutes me when out on a jog.

Good Dogie

I taught my cattle dog to moo,
Not something that my cat’ll do,
No doubt because she knows I want it.
Cats have dignity, and flaunt it.

Coping Mechanisms

The sky’s a smoky yellow-grey.
It’s always been/will be this way.¹

Denial, anger, bargaining,
Depression, autumn, winter, spring,
And scorching summer are less scary
When we know they’re temporary.²

—Accepting Pleasant-Weather Loss:
The Zen of ¹Dogs and ²Kübler-Ross

Conscious Deception

Sleeping dogs don’t lie;
Once awakened, though, they’ll claim
That they weren’t asleep.

Tomato/Potato

Cats have kittens.
Squirrels, too!*
My dog would like
One each, to chew.

*Sometimes a squirrel kit’s a pup,
But mine still likes to chew them up.

Happification

The purpose of a tennis ball
Is happying a dog.
That’s all.

More important than a racquet
To the dog
Is bringing back it
(Not the stick–
This it’s the ball
Which happifies the dog).
That’s all.

Dogs won’t write a book report
About which lines define the court;
Among the things they won’t forget
Is anything about a net
Because it didn’t register.
The only things that mattered were:

The one who threw it, and
The ball.

Enhappified canine!
That’s all.

And That’s Why I Call Her Bluey

I tried to paint my sleeping dog.
She startled, gave my arm a jog,
And made me tip the pigment cup,
So now I have a painted pup!

Projectionists

It’s said that dogs
Are man’s best friend
But not by dogs.
While we pretend
They understand
Our every word
That we might theirs
Is just absurd.
We get along
At times there’s love
But friendship-wise
Push comes to shove
How likely is it
Dogs would choose
A human over
Leather shoes
A squirrel carcass
Bacon fat
Or cheese?
We’re friends.
Let’s go with that.