It’s cold outside and wet as well
This time last week was hot as Hell
Assuming Hell’s like 30 C
(The office number next to me)
The house is cozy, toasty warm.
Now, all we need’s a freezing storm
To close the roads so we’ll be stuck
At home on Monday…
No such luck.
Christmas concerts warm the heart.
If only practice didn’t start
So soon! Perhaps I’m getting old,
But all these snow songs make me cold!
I’m wearing a blanket
From now until spring.
I’m not hot ’cause I’m not
Wearing one other thing.
The moon is full, like every night,
Except that now there’s lots of light
Illuminating half the sphere
In such a way that over here
On Earth we see a bright, white disc.
You lycanthropes are now at risk
Of transformation: Stay inside,
Or ask your tasty friends to hide.
Eastern seaboard’s battened down
In case Aunt Irma comes to town
To do what Harvey did in Texas,
Still a vast disaster nexus.
Here amid the western pyre
No two towns are not on fire;
Nights are brighter than the days
As sun’s eclipsed by smoke and haze.
East gets wetter, west gets hotter.
Can’t we trade our flames for water?
Somewhere, there’s a happy mean
Where skies are blue and lawns are green
And inundate is not a word.
But man-made climate change? Absurd.
I won’t complain about the heat,
The sunscreen I’ve been slopping on,
Or that the lawn’s in full retreat
(At least ’til after Harvey’s gone).