3:48 a.m.

I write poetry
Punctuation shouldn’t be
Keeping me awake


Spenserians Need Not Apply

Five to seven rhymes in fourteen lines
With two or three ideas and a “turn”
Or volta–which, you’ll be chagrined to learn,
Is placed at different points for different kinds–
With pentametric iambs down their spines:
Spot that, you’ve got a sonnet! Shakespeare’d spurn
The references to ABBA, and he’d churn
Out couplets on which Petrarch’d levy fines,
But both the English and Italians
Were faithful to their favored sonnet forms
To such extent that they begat namesakes
As recognizable as two old friends.
For centuries they both have weathered storms
Of taste and fashion. (All the rest are fakes.)

Speedy Joe

I call my turtle Speedy Joe.
It’s funny ’cause he’s really slow
And pops amphetamines like gum.
That’s comedy where I come from.
Before you ask me if his name
Is Joe, it’s not, but all the same,
Admit it: Speedy Joe sounds cooler
Than his given name, Heath Shuler.


My cat’s a natural poet
With a gift for vocalizing rhyme.
I’ll think, This time she’ll blow it,
But she salvages it every time.
I’ve importuned her, Tutor me?
If I can learn it, tell me how!

She tries, but can’t get through to me.
The only thing I hear’s meow!