The Fifth Dentist Said It Was Okay

It’s possible to yawn so wide
Your eyes roll back and fall inside
The void that is your gaping maw
So you can see behind your jaw
To where that Hot Tamale’s stuck
But eyes can’t hold floss picks. Good luck.


Maybe Next Week

“Planning’s overrated”
Says the man who’s never waited
All week long for Saturday
And then just sat the day away

The Half-Life Of Horror

It’s difficult maintaining rage
When every day we turn the page
From yesterday’s appalling gaffe
To one that’s new and worse by half.
Today’s atrocity grows faint
So rapidly it’s almost quaint
A week from now, like old invective:
Gable’s damn was more effective
In its day than pussy was
Just eight short months ago, because
Revulsion has a sell-by date.
Does clusterfuck offend you? Wait
A week, and if you’re still offended,
Great! That means the slide has ended–
No more depths are left to plumb!
But Trump’s too clusterfucking dumb.

Sneezin’s End

So, here’s the deal: My filter’s off.
It’s like I’m editing a cough
Or proofreading a sudden sneeze,
So heiten mein gesund, here, please.
I don’t have plans for what I’m writing,
I’m just reading. It’s exciting,
Watching what my digits wreak!
This has been a stressful week
And deadlines only stoke the flame,
So if this reeks, this week’s to blame.
Is that a cop-out? Probably.
That’s fair. So, blame the week on me.
When down to it we’ve all arrived,
I’m simply glad we’ve all survived.
Just one more week, then summer’s gone!
It’s just as well. I miss my lawn.