Boy George

George Washington was said to be
The acme of integrity,
The proof of which was, when a vandal
Chopped a cherry tree, the scandal
Never had a chance to brew
Before the culpa you-know-who:
“Father,” said young Master George,
“’Twas I who was thy orchard’s scourge!
With this, my hatchet, did I chop
That stalwart of thy cherry crop.
I could not—would not even try—
This wanton action to deny.
I prithee, ere I grow unnerved,
Pronounce my punishment, deserved!”
That punishment, of course, was that
He’d have to wear a silly hat
And wouldn’t be allowed to sit
In boats while he was wearing it.
The point? I cannot tell a lie:
I haven’t really got one. I
Just saw the date and started writing.
Wish I had a more exciting
Tale to tell. That’s how it goes
Sometimes. Oh, well. Sure, I suppose
I could point out that chopping wood
For exercise might do you good.
I also might compare/contrast
Two presidents, the first and last,
And their respective attitudes
Towards honesty…but really, dudes
And dudettes, when the cherry hits
The orchard floor, what’s left? The pits.


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