Decorating Tip

Seems a former rat or toad or
Wind-in-Willows critter’s odor
Leaking up from underneath
The floor has set on edge our teeth.
So, what to do when something’s died?
Go kill a tree to bring inside!
Chopping down and hauling plants in
Sets your nostril buds a-dancin’
(‘Specially when what you’ve cut’s
Competing with dead rodent butts).
Vegetarians are right:
Dead creatures? Yuck. Dead trees? Delight!
The scent of murdered fir or pine
Will brighten any home like mine
In which a recently-deceased
Wee beastie’s reek has been released.
Plus, we’ve a reason built right in:
It’s Christmas! Trim the tree. Win-win!
It’s fun! It’s festive! What it’s not
Is laden with the stench of rot,
And that makes any holiday
More joyous. Ho-ho-ho-hooray!


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