Vesuviyou, Vesuvime

What were you doing in 79?
If you were in Pompeii, you’re likely still there
Frozen stiff in an attitude of, “We’ll be fine!”
As Vesuvius blew and hot ash replaced air.

Dancing Gene

The Romans, with their number-spelly
System, would say C’s for Kelly
(Gene) who, August 23rd,
Was born in 1912. I’ve heard
A lot of folks declare Astaire
The better dancer, which is fair,
But it’s comparing dancing fruit–
The apple’s spats to citrus’ suit.
Where Fred Astaire was debonair
And glided (glid?) as if on air,
Gene Kelly had a gymnast’s grace
And leapt and slid about the place.
My Desert Island DVD
Collection — electricity
And all the gear on which to play
The discs were also cast away
In this scenario — includes
The tale of those two dancing dudes
(O’Connor, D., and Kelly, G.,
And Princess Leia’s mom makes three)
Who, when the movies switched to sound
From silence, somehow stuck around
By– what? “The Artist?” No, it’s plain
I’m talking “Singin’ In The Rain!”
Well, anyway, a hundred years
Have passed since first the nurses’ cheers
And doctors’ hollers shook the wards
For Gene’s debut upon the boards:
The second he escaped from mom
He shed the cord with great aplomb
And shuffled (baby feet don’t tap)
Across the room to Daddy’s lap
Where, spinning with balletic grace,
He spit up in his papa’s face,
The greatest entrance ever seen!
Happy Birthday, Dancing Gene.

25 To Life

A – An Anniversary!
B – Boy, this is hard.
C – Can I start over, please?
D – That’s for Discard.
E – Excitement Everywhere!
F – Fine Family Fun!
G – Good Golly, Galbreaith clan
H – Have a Happy one!
I – If you’re Italian, It’s
J – Joyeux anniv— No,
K – Kidding! That’s français, n’est-ce pas?
L – Learning as we go…
M – Marriage is a lot like that:
N – Never Nothing New.
O – Only One in three survive
P – Past ten years. It’s true!
Q – Quite Quixotic, then, to try
R – Racing up the aisle
S – Since Statistics Say you Seek
T – Trouble, Tears, and Trial.
U – Upsetting? Sure, but some
V – Vanquish o’er the odds
W – With Wedded bliss:
X – Xanadu, b’gods!
Y – Yes! You two have made it!
My sister and her beau
Are silver-plated celebrants!
(Is there a Z word? No.*)

*While I admit that “Zounds” would fit,
Will I deploy it?
‘Cause Z is letter 26;
They haven’t earned it yet!


When you have roommates
Life is compromise
If A likes what B hates
They’re sad girls (or guys)
Misstep in this dance
And be prepared for shocks
Like tacos in your underpants
And cheese fries in your socks

When you have roommates
And you get along
A likes who B dates
And life is like a song
B cares for C’s plants
And casual cooking rocks:
Make tacos in your underpants
And cheese fries in your socks

Also, All My Hands Are Spatulas

I should not have awakened yet.
I’m not in bed. Why? I forget.
I could have sworn I was asleep
But I don’t swear. I’m not a creep.
Hey, hold on: That just isn’t true!
I’m not a creep, but swear? I do!
I used to be a Navy man;
If anyone can swear, I can!
Ergo (a Latin epithet),
I must not have awakened yet!
I swear–I really do–that’s good!
Awakened yet I not have should.

Breaking? Away!

A solitary rider, I.
Just wave as I go rolling by;
For heaven’s sake, don’t flag me down
And ask to ride with me to town!
The cloud with which I ride is freaky.
Bobby Brady’s evil Tiki
Never scaled the woe-betiding
Heights you will, beside me riding.
All you have to do is say,
“Hey, join us on our ride today!”
And all the peloton is cursed.
As domestiques go, I’m the worst.
This afternoon, e.g., a friend
Invited me to mark the end
Of this week’s heat wave with a nice
Cool evening ride (with hills for spice).
So, twenty minutes down the lane
I shifted gears and popped my chain.
Good news! I’d brought a chain tool. Woo!
Then, someone broke it. (You know who.)
A thirty-minute jury-rigging
Session finally fixed the frigging
Chain, and we set off…and that
Is when I got my daily flat.
Ten minutes on the gravel shoulder
Dropped the temps from cool to colder.
“Look! The sun is setting! Gee,
What’s taking us so long?” (Well, me.)
We turned around headed back
Before the night obscured the track
And just before our paths divided
Near our homes, my less-excited-
Than-before host said to me,
“Let’s try tomorrow. Are you free?”
I’d love to go, but I confess
I couldn’t bear to tell him, “Yes.”
I mean, he’s seen my riding jinx.
My chain has just so many links
And now my tool is busted, too!
I don’t think I should go. Do you?