That's Why It's Called A "Rumpus"

This is not the place, I know,
To let my self-obsession show.
A poet should be Everyman
(Or Everywoman, if he can)
In order to illuminate
The ways in which we all relate.
One failing, though, I haven’t solved:
I’m staggeringly self-involved.
My self-absorption’s so complete
I radiate no body heat
And if an object in my orbit
Isn’t watchful, I’ll absorb it.
Difficult though it may be
To turn attention back to me
In any given situation,
That I’ll do with exultation!
Let the wild rumpus start!
(That’s what happens when I fart.)